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"It's Not Me: It's The others!"

April 15, 2018

I have a friend who laughs and gives me that reply every time I ask her how she is.  The truth is, that there are times when, if it wasn't for someone else, our lives would be so much easier, less stressful and uncomplicated. We wouldn't be let down, hurt or inconvenienced, to name bur a few emotions.

 

Thinking about those situations, I saw this hot air balloon photo and it reminded me that it's always a lovely sight to see one soaring high up in the sky.  But, if you look up and see many flying together, it is so much more beautiful.   

 

I don't know if you have ever been for a ride in a hot air balloon, I haven't, but I know a few people who have.  You are asked to call at certain times before the planned ride, and they will tell you whether or not it will be able to go ahead.  I don't know if you realise, but the pilot of a hot air balloon cannot pilot its exact direction; it is dependent largely on the weather.  A minibus follows the balloon so they can drive the people back to the starting point/car park. 

 

There is a general direction and flight path, but it doesn't always go to plan from that first date when you make arrangements for the trip, through to the actual trip.  One of my friends made several attempts to book their trip but it was cancelled so many times.  However, when the experience actually happened, they had a wonderful time and the unsuccessful, disapointing attempts, became a distant memory because the good memories took over.

 

I have a close relative whom I had been trying to see for nearly a year.  Each time I extended them an invitation, they had a good reason as to why they couldn't come.  At the time, it was hurtful and upsetting especially knowing that they did get together with other people on many other occasions during that same time frame, and yet for me, they were always working.

 

So what do you do in those situations?  Give up trying?  Ignore them?  Will it make your world a better place if you so?  Will it spare you the pain of being rejected over and again?  Live life alone to protect yourself? 

 

There could be many reasons for someone rejecting you.  Sometimes you have done, or said, something to them, whether intential or not, indirectly or directly, and so the only way they can cope is to distance themselves from you.  Try to find out if you have upset them and how you can restore relations.

 

At other times, it could be because they cannot face a truth, and so in a bid to hide from it, they keep their distance from you and unjustly put the blame squarely at your door. 

 

If you cut all those people who hurt you, intentionally or otherwise, out of your life,  what a lonely life it would be; and besides, it doesn't reallly give the satisfaction you think it will.  Those of you who have read my book, Life After Death: A Mother's Story will know that I favour keeping the door ajar, and trying everything in my power, to restore relations.

 

I wonder if you have heard of Job?  I'll tell you about him tomorrow!

 

Photo by ellehem on Unsplash

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